Tonight we visited with some new friends that Eric and the boys met at the local park yesterday. Jeff and Aurora are in the Army and are stationed here...Eric was thrilled to have some time for "man talk" and we loved visiting with them. Their 2 boys and our 2 boys had a blast together -- Aurora and I said we don't know what we would do with 4 boys so close in age! We had a wonderful meal and it was so nice being able to get out and visit. Both boys were pretty well pooped out by the time we got home...which is a nice bonus to the evening!
Today I was able to meet with Julianna for our 3rd parent meeting. I had a list of questions, and I'm sure she was thrilled when she saw my notebook. But yet again she was able to give us so much insight about Cade. One of the things we talked a lot about was when Cade stops talking during therapy...that has been concerning to me considering he is really a very verbal child with a pretty high IQ. Today in therapy Cade went nonverbal - he pretended to be a cat - and instead of trying to elicit talking Julianna and Eric just went along with his cat game. Cade loved this, and it was amazing to me watching it back on video at just how much two-way conversation, albeit nonverbal, was happening during that play time. Since we weren't inundating him with words he was able to focus more on his motor planning...he didn't have to form words or even think about what he was going to say. He simply was able to play...and it was really awesome to see.
Here is an example of what happens with just too much language...Cade cannot process his "plan." You will see Julianna try to help him with his motor planning here:
After over 2 weeks here I have a such a mixed bag of thoughts and emotions. I am so impressed and thrilled at how much we have learned here. There is no way we could have helped Cade without the unbelievable knowledge we have gained here. We have gained an understanding of Cade and his development that we would never have gotten anywhere else. As his parents we are so far from where we were when we came here...we are in tune to the reasons that Cade behaves the way he does and have already been working on so many things to help us be better responders to him as he struggles.
It has also been so hard as we have seen deficits in Cade that we did not even realize were there. I feel as if, although we have made so much progress here, we were in such a different place when we arrived that we even thought we were. So it has made it seem as if our progress has not been as quick as I had hoped. I think I have been struggling with that so much over the past few days...the fact that things seem so much "worse" than I even thought they were. I have asked myself over and over how I possibly could have missed it...how I could have been right smack dab in the middle of this journey with my little boy and actually had no idea what he was feeling, or what was truly happening in his little body.
God helped to put that into perspective for me today. A family here that we have spoken to several times has a 10-year-old girl with a variety of developmental disorders. Today when we were outside she had complete meltdown...running and hitting. It all was so familiar it was almost hard for me to watch. I actually felt her parents' heart as it was happening...it has happened to me so many times. When she was able to get some control I talked to her dad a bit. He told me that she does have some high-functioning autism and pervasive developmental disorders, but that the doctors were not able to tell them exactly what her issues were. He told me that even as a baby she struggled...she cried constantly and had sensory issues at a young age.
That could have been us...would definitely have been us...had we not intervened right now. And although I am struggling so much watching my little boy struggle so much, at least we do know what is happening with him and are able to get the right help. And yes, this journey will be a long one. And I know this journey will never, ever be fast enough for me. But I know in my heart that we made the right move at the right time...before this journey careens completely out of control before our eyes.
Tomorrow begins our two days off. I have plans to see more of the Denver...I have been researching a bit and talking with the locals about things to do in the area. And although there are a ton of activities here, I think I have picked the few that we will actually be able to handle. So hopefully we'll be able to visit a butterfly emporium here that I have been told has a creepy crawly room...yep, pretty much right down our alley. And hopefully I can enjoy the journey for our last week here...because in just one week we lose our tour guide and are left to move on alone.
There have been so many experiences that we have had here...so many friends to which we have said both hello and goodbye. But we have also said hello and goodbye to so many other things here...goodbye to so many expectations that were unrealistic or hello to many expectations that we didn't believe were actually possible. Goodbye to things we were trying that weren't working...hello to a different kind of interaction with our little boy - one that might seem uncomfortable but one that works for Cade. And before this journey ends I can only imagine just how many hellos and goodbyes will have crossed our path. So I will alter my armor and continue pressing on. Because I know that when we reach our journey's end it will have been made all the more sweet by our willingness to say hello and goodbye, even though it's sometimes through barred teeth and dragging feet.
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| Thanks, Dad, for adapting to what I need! |
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