Staying in the lines

Sometimes when I get the chance to really stop and think about where we have been over the past year through the journey with Cade I am truly able to realize just how far we've come.  Each day is a new experience, mind you...I walk on eggshells each day waiting to see what is in store.  But in the rare moments when I am able to look at the whole picture, that is where I am able to celebrate the "small stuff".

Cade still cannot really hold a pencil very well.  We are still working on his grip, and which hand he is going to use for that matter, and by the time he gets that much figured out his grip is either so hard that he breaks the point or so soft that it just falls right out of his hand.  And of course he is so frustrated and tired by then that he doesn't even want to write or draw or even color.  This has been a huge struggle for me...of course the teacher part of me wants him to be able to soar academically.  But I know that in the big scheme of things this isn't really a big deal.  This will come, I know...just another thing that I need to be patient about.

This morning I picked Cade up from his class at church.  When I finally got him to acknowledge I was there and stop circling the classroom, and then find his shoes - which he had apparently deposited somewhere in the climbing wall - I began to herd him out of the door.  One of his teachers stopped me to hand me the picture that Cade had colored during the lesson.  I thanked him and managed to get Cade into the hallway to lean against the wall so I could put his shoes back on (much to his dismay, I might add...), then wrestle them onto his feet while he was jumping around because he discovered that he had to go the bathroom right at that moment.  Luckily we were able to fly around the corner and he made it into the one-stall men's room, and I said a silent prayer it was unoccupied (because don't you know he would have just pushed himself right on in if he could...).

As I was waiting for Cade to finish I opened the picture that I had folded on the way out of the classroom.  To most people it would seem so insignificant.  The circular scribbles covered the little lamb peeking out from behind the bold color choices my little boy had decided to use.  But the scribbled circles and lines warmed my heart.  You see, I knew just how hard this must have been for him - to sit down in a little chair long enough to make this masterpiece. 

As I stood in the hall looking at his work I overheard another mom picking up her little girl from Cade's room.  The little girl proudly held her picture up to her mom, to which her mom praised, "You even stayed in the lines, honey!"  I glanced over to see a picture with bright colors and an obvious effort to keep her coloring actually in the picture.  Of course, an excellent 4-year-old piece of work.  The mom was so proud, and the two of them moved on down the hall. 

As my little boy finally made his way out of the door of the men's room and took off sprinting down the hall, I had to chuckle to myself.  Sometimes I wonder if we will ever be "in the lines."  It seems we are always just a little outside, never truly on the picture.  But hey, I just celebrate the days that we are even on the paper!

And I had to laugh out loud at God's ironic sense of humor.  The title of Cade's little lamb picture?  "Cecil, The Lost Sheep."  Thanks, Cecil, for helping me to put things in perspective today...